MINISTER OF CREATIVITY, copywrite 2014 ————-

Spending the night, as a quest of a woman artist, in northern New Mexico was eye-opening, but not unexpected. The day before she explained, the best she could, about why she painted such emotional images. She began her designs years ago when she was a young teenager. She would be painting at her art table, looking out the window at the dirt road, fields and mountains, when her Father would come into her room. She knew what to do to minimize the unpleasantness and pulled down her panties and bent over her drawing board. As she was being violently penetrated from the rear, her face was being pushed into her paint and shoved around as he controlled her by grabbing her hair. Today, she remembers the patterns and shapes that her Father created with her face in the paint as he raped her. As I said, an eye-opening story.

I came into her studio as she was smearing reds, oranges and blues on her canvas completely naked. After her initial emotional release, she would go back and paint one of the Churches she loved, over the pure expressionistic composition. It was an intimately private moment. She actually needed someone to watch her do this. She occasionally had another man in the studio, penetrating her, while she did the original layer. She looked at me invitingly, but I could only, that day, participate in the passive role of her art fantasies, and watch her. I understood the need to have others help in these, abuse re-enactments, I needed the same thing. By the next day, after further discussions with her, I might be able to be a more active participant, but the abused victim needed to control completely the abuse scene, which requires a lot of talk and explanation of mood and actions. It would be a major sacrifice to help someone in this way, as I looked at the crosses and statues in her studio. I heard her pray for someone to help her and care for her enough, which may have been a manipulation, but that’s alright. I had to decide quickly if I would stay over another day. (These stories will be continued on my other web site.)


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